Talk About Independent Living
Talk About Independent Living With Your Parents
It’s important to talk to your parents about independent living. Your parents might have lived in their home for decades, so it’s understandable that they are not eager to move to a new place when they get older. Even if the house is getting difficult to maintain or doesn’t meet their needs, there are years of memories there. Change can be hard for everyone involved.
We recently found this nice article on AARP and thought you should read it. You can even sign up for Health Newsletters at their site.
It’s good to talk with your parents while they are still health about what might be needed to remain living independently- often parents and loved ones find some peace of mind in discussing those issues when things are going well. If you wait until a crisis occurs, you will have to make decisions quickly and you might not know your loved one’s wishes.
Many adult children don’t know how to bring up the subject of independent living with their parents. Here are some tips for sharing this difficult dialogue, keeping focused and dealing with resistance.
Beginning the conservation: Raise the issues indirectly, mention a friend’s mother who recently hired in-home help, or an article that you read about programs at a nearby senior center. Example: “Is that something you might be interested in learning more about?”
Find Small ways to bridge the issue: Example: ” I know you’re taking pills for arthritis, your heart and cholesterol. Would it help if you had one of those medication organizers you can buy in the drugstore?”
Share your own emotions: Example: ” Dad, it’s hard for me to see you slowing down and I know you’ve always prided yourself on being independent I imagine it’s difficult for you to ask for help, but what are some things that we can do?”
Set the right tone: Once the topic has been brought up, listen to how your parents feel about their current needs, concerns, worries and hopes for the future. Don’t guess or make assumptions about your parents’ preferences. Ask open-ended questions. that get them to express their perceptions.
Use communication that states your concern and avoids criticism. Example: ” I’m feeling concerned that you may fall coming down the stairs. I could put a 100 watt bulb at the bottom of the stairs and install a handrail: Don’ say: ” Going upstairs in your condition is ridiculous. You’re sure to fall.”
Avoid role reversal: Helping our doesn’t mean you are “parenting” your parents. The most productive interaction comes when parents and adult children are equal in the relationship.
If your parents condition requires Assisted Living with everyday activities. Then you need to consider a assisted living home Sun City, California. They offer full time assisted living services. We monitor and accommodate your parents with daily meals, assistance with taking their medications, clothing and bathing.
